This Christmas, I found myself with a new unexpected challenge. I "fostered" this cute little puppy for an entire month so that my nephew would have a big surprise from Santa on Christmas morning. I thought the challenge would be to feed, house train, and clean up after this little guy, but the real challenge was letting him go! It's amazing how attached I got in such a short time. I think he helped me get through most of the holiday season without thinking too much about not having Micalee here; he just kept me too busy and helped fill that empty space in my heart. But now that he's gone from our home, that emptiness is back, stronger than ever before! It also made me realize what Micalee's birth mother will be going through, and yes I know there's a big difference between a puppy and a baby, and maybe I shouldn't compare the two, but it did make me think of the pain she will be experiencing (and on such a larger scale). I have never cried so hard as when I had to leave this little guy on at my sister's doorstep. My heart was breaking. Maybe I'm just too emotional! At least I can see this puppy grow, and I know he's happy and loved in his new home. She'll always just wonder, but never know for sure. I know I'll always be grateful to her for her ultimate sacrifice.

21 Months and counting...

Blackjack?! Well, it is now officially (as of yesterday) 21 months since our LID for Micalee! How many more to go?! Well, if I knew that, things would be alot easier! Will she be home, or will we at least have a picture of her, by NEXT Christmas!? The way things are looking now, the answer is no, but I'm still holding on to hope that things in China will speed up, and we'll have her home in 2008! If you look at numbers, only, it doesn't look to hopeful. But the thing is, there was a time when the wait got up to 18 months (and yes, we're way beyond that now!), and then things starting speeding up and got back down to 6 months, so anything is possible. So for now, we're just concentrating on having the best Christmas possible, knowing that it's another one without our little girl home with us. But we have the best, most supportive family, and we know we'll have a very special Christmas, and we know that we will eventually have our little girl here to help us celebrate the holidays and enjoy all the little things that go along with them!